Just Me

Clothes

Pay so much for clothes so small
Was that shirt made for me or my doll?
Is this all I get?
I looked so hot but caught a cold
I was doing just what I was told to fit in…

There is something profoundly exciting about getting things marked off a to-do list :)

When do you stop caring?

So, I recently went on a camp that was dealing with kids who had been abused or neglected. Each primary aged child was paired up with a buddy, and we did everything together for a week. My Camper was awesome. She was great fun and I really enjoyed camp. There were times when the staff supervised our campers, so we could debrief as a team, and talk about how we were going with our campers and what support we needed etc. It was really hard to hear the stories of where some of these kids came from, and where they would be going back to. It hurts so much to care. You could get so caught up in what these kids are facing everyday, and just cry for days at the injustice of it all. You could lose yourself in it, and never be the same again. But is that always healthy? At what point do you need to continue living your life? You don’t want to be cold and distant either, not caring about the trial others face and content with your own life. But sometimes, it seems like it’s the only way to avoid getting hurt. It’s a self-protection mechanism. Where do we find the balance between caring too much, and caring too little?

Betrayal

Betrayal is one of the most hurtful experiences of pain one can feel.The reason is this: Anyone can abuse you, spread rumours, or humiliate you. But only a friend can betray a friend; a stranger has nothing to gain. And only a friend could ever come close enough to inflict so much pain.

The other day I lost my necklace. It was a really special one, and had significant sentimental value. That night, I searched my room for it, and the next day, I looked around at work, incase I had dropped it somewhere. All to no avail. Then yesterday, I found it, at the bus stop! I had been there twice since I had lost it, but only just saw it then! Yay!! :)

‘Perfect People’

There have been numerous people who have entered my life recently, who seem to be amazing at everything. They make friends very easily, they are instantly accepted into their new social surroundings, their opinions and advice are valued and they seem to be loved by all. It seems they can never put a foot wrong. What is it about these people that make them able to fit into their surroundings? It makes me wonder, if that had been me, if I had met the same people at the same time, gone to the same places, would I be in the same situation, be accepted by those around me, be offered the position in their circle that has been offered to these ‘perfect people.’ I know this post appears relatively superficial, jealous, and, dare I say, bitchy, but it does make me wonder… Why do some people always land on their feet wherever they go, while others are left standing on the outside, wondering what we said wrong?

tarahasapetdragon asked: welcome to this pretty little world

Thanks! :)

Stormy Weather

There seem to be so many things we fear as humans. We fear things like heights, small spaces, large crowds. We also fear trusting other people, we fear revealing ourselves, we fear failure. What is about ourselves that provokes this fear? And, more importantly, how do we get rid of it? Trying to chase away fear is like trying to chase darkness out of a room. It’s impossible. The only way to dissipate darkness is to bring light, and the dark is gone. Open the blinds, turn on the lights. It is the same with fear. It is only in bringing love into our hearts that we can be truly rid of fear.